Small Talk #2 (Mar 2002)
A MESSAGE FROM JACQUELYN SMALL, Founding Director of Eupsychia Institute:

When our spiritual eyes open wide and we see that we are running to the very edge of our own demise, a call goes out to those of us with initiate consciousness, and a response is heard from deep within our hearts. We become obsessed with an intense yearning to get on with a way of life that satisfies our deeper urges. We cry out, often for help, hoping to align truly with our bigger story that out-pictures our greater life. This is a natural evolutionary phenomenon of our species-type that registers on our consciousness when the time has come to move on. You might think of this as a call to service that's been known throughout the Ages, being drafted to enter into training for active duty as a willing disciple within the conscious circle of Humanity. Initiates are those who have committed to help humankind evolve by walking the path of direct experience, learning and documenting the journey as they go. They are not better than anyone else, just willing to serve the evolutionary process, a grand design beyond our normal intellect's comprehension.

You may be already knowing you are now to take more of a risk, no matter where you are working or living right now, to model for others a higher, more authentic way of living, and to hold the hands of those who are feeling fear. From this point forward, you'll notice that your motivations will shift away from the familiar, and a set of new interests will start to register upon your awareness screen. S ometimes you will even walk away from a comfortable lifestyle or vocation and wonder what on earth you are doing! But deep within you will know that you are being guided by some benevolent entity or force.

As stated so poignantly by the Tibetan Master Dwhal Khul in the Alice Bailey teachings:

"One who is dedicated to service is one who seeks to learn a
new rhythm, to enter a new field of experience, and to follow
the steps of that advanced humanity who have trodden ahead
of him the path leading from darkness to light, and from the
unreal to the real." (see A Treatise on White Magic, p.58-60)

I don't know about you, but I always stumble around for awhile when I first hear the Call to leave the comfort of what I've already created in my work or family life. Even though I am quite used to this process, it still always catches me off-guard and feeling unprepared. I've noticed the pattern: I'll first go through a time of believing my work is over, and I'll feel powerless and somewhat depressed. Then, a feeling will come over me that I don't know how to do what's needed, and a frustration sets in where I may bounce around trying this or that and finding none of it is quite right. And finally, just surrendering and allowing all the old negative stops to butt up against my forward-seeking soul, observing all this resistance and doubt, but trying hard not to act on them. Then, what happens without fail feels like magic: Something is brought to me as a brand new opportunity, and always one I would never have thought of myself. Always a surprise. Yet when the new does appear, there is a feeling of "yes, of course." As though someone in me already knew that this is indeed an aspect of my own unfolding and a work I am truly prepared to bring forth. And always something that renews my passion and sense of sacred purpose.

The hardest part in all this is to know that we must step out of the comfort zone and our old familiar ways to make room for the new. This is so very logical, yet when required to really do it, we nearly always balk. It's good to remember that the personality likes "the known" and strives for some kind of constancy one can depend on to feel safe, while the soul is an adventurous spirit, never concerned at all about safety of any sort; it knows that it is eternal and that nothing under the sun can harm it. Your soul loves serving the whole with the same voracity, as your ego loves serving itself!

So here we are -- always -- a mixture of personality and soul. One wants us to stay put, the other, to move on. Remaining in this tension of the opposites until the path opens toward our next destination is the work of every true disciple. Faith is the resting place we sit within as we "hang in the dangle" between what's ended and what has not quite yet begun.

An initiation is an expansion of consciousness, a means of opening the mind and heart to a recognition of what already exists in Reality. When we take an initiation, it happens within the inner life, and is not necessarily tied to any identifiable event in the outer world -- though sometimes the inner and outer will touch in a spontaneous magical moment, and, as if the doors to Heaven open, you catch a glimpse of your life's purpose unfolding upon a larger canvas.

So join us anytime you can and discover members of your soul family you've always known, waiting to greet you and support your next right step in coming whole! if you've read this far, your new life is already beginning.


In loving service,
Jacquelyn Small

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